I’ve been through a lot. I have been raped a total of 3 times in my life. At 11, by a “family friend” who got me drunk. At 16, I was repeated raped by a boyfriend who beat me and told me he’d kill me if I left him. And then, the same year, this happened. I’d buried this memory for a long time, buried it so far away I thought it would never surface again…
((TRIGGERING.))
I was drunk, being driven home. Dude drives me out to the middle of nowhere, takes me in my drunken stupor, pulls me on top of him, pulls my underwear to the side. I can’t say no. I can’t say anything. I’ve been drugged. He rapes me, ejaculates inside me, drops me off at home. I walk in, still drunk, get yelled at, mumble something at my mother, go upstairs and shower…
I didn’t report it. I couldn’t. I’d get in trouble for being drunk underage, something that had the potential to mess my entire future up.
I saw him years later and started freaking out at the bar, I had to be taken outside and driven home by a friend.
God, I never wanted to remember this. I never wanted to think about it again. I never wanted this to come back…I want this out of my head now… Please, just go away.
